From persistent mind-generated problems to a personal journey of awakening, this article delves into the power our minds hold and how we are dismally unaware of how our mind is separate from our Self.
- Mind's Relentless Chatter: The article highlights how our minds often create and magnify problems, making us dwell on past regrets and future concerns.
- A Journey of Awakening: The author shares a personal experience of healing and transformation after recognizing the need to separate from the mind's control.
- Becoming Aware of Your Thoughts: The article stresses the importance of noticing when your mind wanders to the past or future. Start to acknowledge how little it sits in the present moment.
Your mind, tirelessly working from past regrets to future worries, seems to conjure new problems before old ones resolve, entangling your life in an unnecessary web of turmoil. Have you noticed its unsettling ability to transport you from the present moment back to past experiences or interactions, triggering sudden rushes of emotions that you desperately try to push aside? Does it delve into anticipation, attempting to predict people's words or actions? Perhaps it crafts excuses to shield you from painful realities? Have you ever noticed that certain words or actions trigger physical reactions like a tight throat, constricted chest, or an impulse to lash out?
The truth is, your mind wields more control over you than you might think. It aims to safeguard you from past wounds and future uncertainties, learned from your past experiences and often unjustified fears. What if I told you that this 'protection' is the very force keeping you stuck and in pain. This 'protection' rears its head when you are triggered.
Before my awakening and healing journey, my heart was not just broken but shattered. I felt as if my soul had been cracked in half. The overwhelming pain led to months of breathless anxiety attacks and insurmountable tears (Twin Flames are no joke, it's been said they're a fast track to healing and self-love, and it’s true). I couldn't escape the loop—my mind fixated on the person, the hurt, the confusion, spiralling deeper. It relentlessly rejected reality, presenting excuse after excuse to shield me.
The problem? It perpetuated this painful loop through overthinking and denial.
Accepting reality also meant facing deep-seated wounds— rejection, fear of abandonment, not being good enough, lack of boundaries, people-pleasing trauma responses, and my lack of self-love and respect. Confronting reality demanded shedding the Ego, and discovering my true self. Not the Ego self I had created to hide behind. The Ego-driven mind is very hard to conquer, it resists releasing control because then it is no longer the one in charge, so it continues to perpetuate anxiety, negativity, and self doubt, trapping us daily. The most unsettling part of it all – you are unconsciously letting it happen, and most of us are completely unaware this is happening.
Are you aware you and your mind are separate?
I was in the deepest, darkest well and I was drowning. And in the darkest depths a profound moment emerged. A beautiful soul, Brigitta, shared words that echoed within me:
"You're putting yourself in a rabbit hole. You are like a horse in quicksand right now. You're stuck. It's like your life is the same every single day. Your emotions, the same every single day. You're choosing to let your mind control you."
That moment changed my life. It altered my perspective on myself and my mind. I was letting my mind control me, dictate my pain. I didn't want to be in pain anymore, yet I allowed my mind drown me in negative spirals incessantly—hourly, daily. It was insanity. That realization sparked a separation—I am not my mind, but a soul distinct from it. It was life-changing.
I was sitting on a park bench with my dog that night, tears streaming, puffy eyes gazing at the full moon illuminating the sky, I confronted my truth. No ifs, ands, or buts—I had to speak the reality my mind had avoided because it hurt too much to acknowledge. I said, "He is gone. He doesn't want to be with me. He's with someone else." I sobbed, feeling all the pain and hurt. A torrent of emotions surged. I wanted to scream, curl up in a ball and never move again. But strangely, moments later, a sense of peace settled in. Surrendering to reality silenced my mind's looping excuses and confusion, it was the first step out of my mind's control.
Previously, every time reality surfaced, I'd almost instinctively push away those thoughts, spiraling into excuses— "he loves you, he'll come back, he's struggling right now". But not this time. I refused to let my mind backtrack into excuses. There was nothing left to protect me from—the truth was out, my mind silent, and I felt liberated.
It's like the present didn't matter to me, so instead, I lived in my head, and in return for living in my mind, I received constant anxiety and pain.
Accepting such a seemingly obvious truth, blocked by my mind for the pain it held, is a significant breakthrough. We often block ourselves from being aware of these seemingly small or obvious truths, so they are held deep inside of us only surfacing fleetingly when triggered, and absolutely pivotal for healing when inwardly examining ourselves.
If your mind swings between past pain and future stress, it signals unresolved blocked energy. Start noticing your mind trailing out of the present moment. When you feel pain or sadness wash over you yet in the present moment yet nothing and no one is around you causing you pain, notice where your mind was. What were you thinking about? Those revisited moments in the past hint at deeper unhealed wounds. You’re being directed to look at your hidden pain and finally allow yourself to feel.